1. Asking your parents, “So, how much would each of us get if you died tonight?” at your holiday dinner.
  2. Telling your parents that you’ll put them in an “old folks home” if they don’t deed you the house NOW.
  3. Disinheriting everyone you know in your will and sending them a copy with detailed descriptions of “why.”
  4. Asking your executor to freeze your body, take it to the beach, and break it into sand with a  large rubber mallot.
  5. Requiring all beneficiary tattoos be removed BEFORE any monies are distributed.
  6. Creating secret off-shore accounts that name your mistress as beneficiary instead of family.
  7. Leave large sums of money for education, but limit its use for Harvard only.
  8. Requiring your surviving spouse to remain celibate to receive his/her inheritance from you.
  9. Leave all your rental property to someone you love – managing tenants can be a nightmare!
  10. Disappear yourself, so everyone has to wait 13 years for you to be presumed dead.
  11. Fail to make a list of all your passwords, so no one can access anything when you’re gone.
  12. Leave evidence of your haunting around before you pass over (like letters that get delivered years later).
  13. Create a trust, but don’t put anything in it!

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